The town of Wrexham is today reported to be consulting experts as to the value of trees in the town regarding their "feel good factor". Please spare me this relentless waste of public money. On the same day as revelations emerge that an Assembly Member for North Wales expressed surprise at the £50 million spent last year to hire locum doctors, it seems as though waste is alive and kicking.
What is the inherent value of trees? Discuss. It might have been a good ruse as a school essay but it is beyond words to think that public servants are seeking advice on the matter. For a full, robust answer to their troublesome question, why don't they chop them all down and see if they can notice any difference? In fact, when they have finally cracked the vexed conundrum of trees, why stop there? Why don't they explore the feel good factor of daffodils when they come in to flower in spring time. This latest piece of local government nonsense has reduced their credibilty to new depths of stupidity. Let me put it another way. In simple basic terms, we need trees more than they need us if you want to just consider the vital equilibrium which exists between our need for oxygen and their need for carbon dioxide. Is it uplifting to see something other than a concrete building or a car or a bus? If they really need to consult someone for the answer to that question, I can only suggest that they get out more often..
Imagine if you will the kerfuffle which might ensue if the Chief Executive was taking a walk in the park and a conker or an acorn fell down on his head. How would he even begin to make sense of such an intrusion in to his erstwhile peaceful existence. Doubtless, a new tree management squad would have to be set up whereby warning notices were placed on all trees yielding seeds or nuts with a size capable of inducing thought should they ever happen upon the head beneath them. Like Herod in the New Testament, he might order a cull of all trees with a height of more than two foot for fear that they might become overly traumatic for people to look at. I can barely sit still for the anticipation of the results of this consultation process and would expect a document of at least 500 pages to emerge. Ironically, a decent wedge of tree would be consumed with the paper needed to conduct such a moronic exercise but it would all be worth it for closure. Yes indeed, the trees in Wrexham must be sweating at this very moment knowing that the chain saw is hovering nearby. Heaven help us if we really have to be subjected to local government of such a pointless nature!
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